Flarf

This sort of drivel has a name and history.

IInglorious Basterds

Goldenman Montas sez:

Which is crooked (for injuring others). He may to the skin,
and with the saltwater running from him? When that irrepressible
one of mighty armsthe at the tip of his tongue though possibly,
had (present) in that battle were filled with wonder..

Teaser

Hermes Watches

Lapham Casbeer sez:

the mother all gold and grit, heroic to joseph andand and
my king, finished the girl into bed he yawned, and casually
stated: well, i should have made up my mind so quickly to
link ruins of viraccocha at tinta, where gigantic walls
cloth and season them with nutmeg and salt, then every hour,
every minute that is left to. Them. Then have some fryed
sweetbreads, sausages of to poirot to solve. Our attention
was first drawn and her maid have deliberately lied to us,
that is no excuse for such lamentable ignorance as to shield
him i am not blind. Then lot liked her. I’m flighty, will?
me? Why, i wouldn’t care if the point was that you mustn’t
get involved in a quite indisputable source, that my presence
it run round like to a whirlepit then break an it was at
this juncture that andrews was despatched folds. The arab
set up the most hideous and piteous enough on various matters.
the elder lemesurier.

Post-Wisdom Acetamicodone

Twitch.  A most unpleasant intoxication stinking of dreams half-formed and thoughts half-completed, fleeting and flickering like a faulty fluorescent.  Indescribable, irritable warmth, itchy and immobilizing.  Physiological fault lines rub and creak and shift slightly only to after-shock back to their original state of slack tension.  No pain dies, it’s just distracted.  It always comes back, and hurts worse if only to make up for lost time.  Paralyzing nausea strikes with a vengeance, making legs wobble and minds fuzz.  Mirror neurons misfire and assume the worst.  APAP smears the pink, mushy synaptic matter on the wall.  A repugnant biological graffiti.  Why do this to yourself?  It’s not like nobody told you so.

Current Events Made Easy

Kobe Bryant becomes an Episcopalian bishop, rapes a Catholic alter boy, and is elected governor of California.  With this power he secedes from the U.S., allies with Iraq, invades Israel and makes his fourth movie, entitled “Kill Putin: Volume I.”

 

I found this while cleaning out my computer room at my dad’s today.  It is in a handwriting I don’t recognize; it could be mine as it varies widely depending on my mental state.  It could also have been written by a friend of mine.  Judging from the editing I had to do on it, and its general insanity, I hope I didn’t write it.  The best part about this strange scrawl is that it was written on the back of a Theology Vocabulary study sheet.  Ad majorem Dei gloriam, indeed.

We Gon’ Ride

What is lost in a literate culture?  The evolution of stories slows, pronunciation is superseded by spelling, recycling is passed off as originality; but these are speculations — in the West it has been millennia since cultural narratives were preserved orally.  Amid concerns about literacy rates and the deterioration of culture transmitted via alphabetical alchemy, post-literate culture emerges.  Video games, hip hop, television, movies, graffiti, text messages, web pidgin: these communicate yet offend be-cultured sensibilities.  Why?

How about some poems?

So, traditionally (ha) spam poetry is lines taken from spam and put together to form, you guessed it, a poem.  Look for one of these in the next post.

I’m not sure how I feel about the last post.  I like the raw, strung-together surrealness of my previous prose postings a bit better than the heavily edited yet still odd and choppy style that emerged in the George Soros experiment.

My Found Text Technique

Really, I don’t do much besides minor editing if I think it will make the piece better; otherwise, I leave what I find alone and post it unadultered. Hence, it is “found” art.

However, I think some more liberal editing might improve the quality of the “finished” work. So, I think I’ll try that. The next post might be George Soros themed.

Public Service Announcement

This blog has been taken over. It will now be put to different uses. As for the former posters, the portal they used to project their communications into this world has been closed.

Now, prepare for some writings.

‘Bout Delays

Howdy, Batzy Byrd here. Don’t b’lieve ya’ll met me yet; I’m th’spyder of Deh Gang. Sah’via hit some rough waves comin’out d’meso and had t’come Terra-side: oneuh dem storms advertised on newsies. Funk’ead pilot need t’mind ‘is craft better.

Inywho, gig on Luna got axed and Olafamon’s movin’on ta Mars. Dis tour’s nutty serious shit, yeah? Do’matter, ima doin m’job down here cept its blastin’ard when ya can’t talk to yer clientel! After missin’ d’spot dey blast off t’Mars a’not’even fix a’dish! Fugs’ache!

An’so, fer’all you aficiones readin: they ain’t postin’up ’til a’dish gets fixed. S’posadly t’morrow.

‘Til that magical time,

BflyB

Batzy Byrd